I got this fortune in a fortune cookie years ago.
I don't recall what restaurant, however, I'm fairly certain it was the one that gave me the worst case of food poisoning I've ever had. Violent diarrhea, reminiscent of cocoa puffs out of a potato cannon and projectile vomiting that would have made the little girl in The Exorcist proud. I was rushed to the ER - don't worry, I managed to keep all involuntary liquid release from both ends while in the car - and spent a day and night there.
I'd put the name of the place I went to but I don't want to hurt their business or encourage people to see what it's like to turn your stomach into a can of soda rolled down a flight of stairs. The definition of explode should scare anyone from trying.
explode
verb 1.burst or shatter violently and noisily as a result of rapid combustion, decomposition, excessive internal pressure, or other process, typically scattering fragments widely.
Out of curiosity and an intense craving for Chinese food without the time to go anywhere else I went back to this place. I was spared being turned into a human geyser in exchange for mild stomach pain and farts that could curdle milk and clear a room.
Yeah, I can hear people saying "dffective? That's accurate for Michael"
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